Has Your Life Been Interrupted?

In my blog last week, I wrote about the reality of life of living in the “sandwich generation”. This generational term has been applied to those of us living in our 40’s, 50’s, 60’s, and sometimes 70’s whose lives are impacted greatly by big issues in our parent(s) lives, our children, and sometimes grandchildren. Our life, or our joyful life, may get lost in the middle of these competing needs.

Many years ago, we had a church drama that frequently comes to mind as I try to manage my own “sandwich”. A man began spinning a plate expertly on a pole. He then proceeded to add more poles, more plates with each spinning at various speeds. He would race back to the plates as their spinning slowed and the plates would begin to wobble. Meanwhile, the narrator would describe what each plate represented…wife needs, the financial strain of a second child in college, work pressures, a parent’s fall, a…you get the point. Eventually, he does not make it back to the wobbling plate and it crashes to the stage impacting the spin of the other plates. Do you relate?

The Call
In my last post, I used the analogy of the instructions we receive from the flight attendant before the flight departs, “be sure and apply your mask before attempting to place one on someone else”. In other words, you can’t help someone else if you haven’t provided care for yourself.

I write this post as I wait for my flight to depart. I’m listening to the instructions more intentionally today. I am captivated by the words preceding the mask instructions, “In the unlikely event of a change in cabin pressure”…yada, yada, yada.

It is true that a change in cabin pressure on a plane is unlikely. But the unexpected events in our life regardless of age, health, wealth, and faith are likely or in fact, inevitable. We just don’t know when it will occur. The lab results are in, the accident occurs, or the call happens and a plate shatters as it hits the ground.

This week I was going to write about self-care, but the call came. My dad was diagnosed with cancer. This was after a complex conversation with my mom (eighty-two and living on her own) about end-of-life planning, and while waiting on the results of my own MRI. Welcome to living in the sandwich generation, right?

Living with the End in Mind
As a physician who has spent most of her career as a hospitalist, I often wonder why God called me to write about a good death. I was trained to save lives. But it was the deaths that occurred through a career in medicine that taught me the most, including the patient who declared on her deathbed, “It’s okay, I am going to have a good death.”.

As I began the discovery of what that meant for the mind, the body, and most importantly the soul, I began to write and publish in newspapers, journals, and magazines, and now a book called Anticipating Heaven that will launch on January 7th, 2025. Her declaration about death brought clarity to my life. This clarity has been so valuable as I personally experience the challenges of living in the sandwich generation.

An important aspect of self-care is having purpose. You, Living with the End in Mind, and Anticipating Heaven have been a part of that purpose for my life, and I can’t thank you and God enough for trusting me with this message. But as I write to you, I am deeply aware that I am also writing to me.

Despite the challenges, we can experience hope, peace, courage, and abiding faith as fellow members of the sandwich generation. But as with life, it won’t always be a straight line, a planned blog, or the expected journey. Together, let’s navigate what we can do now, but also what we may need to do in critical conversations, the unexpected calls, and in our own health journeys which at this moment may feel terrible.

If this resonates with you, and or someone you know, sign up for Living with the End in Mind and we will journey together. For any specific questions about your circumstance, reach out to me on the contact form and begin your message with Dear Dr. Pamela. If I don’t know the answer, I will make every attempt to find the best answer.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing,
so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.”
Romans 15:13

– Dr. Pamela

Thank you for reading my blog! I’m Dr. Pamela Prince Pyle, a hospitalist specializing in death, grief, and suffering with over thirty years of experience. My upcoming book, “Anticipating Heaven,” is set to release in January 2025 and explores the intersection of faith and medicine in approaching life’s final chapters. If you or a loved one have received a serious diagnosis, I have resources to help you navigate this challenging time. Please feel free to contact me with any questions or to share your story. Your journey matters, and I’m here to support you.